You’ve just finished a job interview. You think it went well, but you’re not entirely sure. A few weeks later, you get that dreaded, generic email: "Thank you for your interest, but we've decided to move forward with other candidates." The big question is, why? Was it your answer to a specific question? Did you seem nervous? Did you not seem enthusiastic enough? This is one of the most frustrating parts of the job search. Companies rarely give you honest, constructive feedback, leaving you to wonder what you could have done better.

After a rejection, it’s tempting to email the hiring manager and ask for feedback. While it shows initiative, you’re unlikely to get a helpful response. Companies are often hesitant to give specific feedback for legal reasons, fearing that their comments could be misinterpreted as discriminatory. As a result, you’re usually left with vague platitudes like "we had many qualified applicants."

Your personal and professional network, however, is a different story. The people in your network—mentors, former colleagues, and even peers—have a vested interest in your success. They aren't bound by corporate policies and can give you the candid, direct feedback that you actually need to improve. They can serve as a safe and supportive space to practice, make mistakes, and learn.

Finding the Right People in Your Network

The first step is to identify who to ask for help. Not everyone in your network is the right fit for a mock interview. You want to choose people who will be honest with you and who have some relevant experience. Here are a few groups to consider:

  • Mentors and Former Managers: These individuals are often your best bet. They have likely been on the other side of the hiring table and know what interviewers are looking for. They also know your strengths and weaknesses and can provide personalized, insightful feedback.
  • Peers in Your Field: A peer who is working in the industry or role you’re targeting can be incredibly valuable. They understand the current landscape, the technical skills required, and the types of questions that are likely to be asked. They can give you feedback that is highly relevant to your specific career goals.
  • Friends in HR or Recruiting: If you have a friend who works in human resources or recruiting, they are a goldmine of information. Their job is to screen and interview candidates all day long. They can give you a behind-the-scenes look at the hiring process and provide expert feedback on everything from your resume to your body language.
  • Career Services at Your Alma Mater: Don’t forget about your college's career center. Even after you’ve graduated, many schools offer free career coaching and mock interview services to their alumni. These professionals are trained to help you put your best foot forward.

How to Ask for Help (Without Being Awkward)

Once you've identified a few people, you need to reach out and ask for their time. The key is to be respectful, specific, and make it easy for them to say yes. You’re not just asking for a favor; you’re asking for their valuable time and expertise.

Here’s a simple email template you can adapt:

Subject: Quick favor & mock interview practice

"Hi [Name],

I hope you’re doing well. I'm currently in the middle of a job search for a [Type of Role] position, and I'm looking to sharpen my interview skills.

I've always respected your opinion and experience in [Their Field], and I was hoping you might have 30 minutes in the next week or two to help me with a quick mock interview. I would really value your honest feedback on my answers and overall presentation.

I’m flexible and happy to work around your schedule. Please let me know if this is something you’d be open to.

Thanks so much,

[Your Name]"

This approach works because it’s polite, it clearly states what you need, it defines the time commitment, and it gives them an easy way out if they are too busy.

Conducting the Mock Interview: Getting the Most Out of It

To get the best possible feedback, you need to treat the mock interview like the real thing.

  • Provide Context: Before you start, send your "interviewer" the job description for a role you are targeting and your resume. This gives them the context they need to ask relevant questions and provide tailored feedback.
  • Dress the Part: Dress exactly as you would for a real interview. This helps you get into the right mindset and allows your contact to give you feedback on your professional appearance.
  • Record the Session: If you are doing the mock interview over a video call, ask for permission to record it. This allows you to go back and watch your own performance later. You might be surprised by the nervous habits or facial expressions you notice when you watch yourself.
  • Go All In: Don't hold back or treat it like a casual chat. Answer the questions as seriously and thoroughly as you would in a high-stakes interview. The more realistic the practice, the more valuable the feedback will be.

Asking the Right Questions to Get Honest Feedback

After the mock interview is over, it’s time for the most important part: the feedback. Don't just ask, "So, how did I do?" That’s too broad. Guide the conversation by asking specific, open-ended questions that will elicit constructive criticism.

Try asking some of these questions:

  • "Was there any point where my answer was unclear or confusing?"
  • "On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate my confidence and enthusiasm?"
  • "What was the weakest part of the interview for me? Where could I improve the most?"
  • "Did my 'Tell me about yourself' story effectively connect my experience to the job description?"
  • "How was my body language? Did I seem nervous or fidgety?"
  • "Was there a question you felt I completely missed the mark on?"
  • "What was the strongest part of the interview? What should I be sure to keep doing?"

By asking specific questions, you make it easier for the other person to provide detailed, actionable advice. Make sure to listen without getting defensive. Thank them for their honesty, and take detailed notes.

Turning Feedback into Action

Getting feedback is only half the battle. The final step is to use that information to improve. Review your notes and the recording of the session. Identify two or three key areas for improvement. Don't try to fix everything at once. Focus on the most critical feedback first.

For example, if you were told that your answers were too long and rambling, practice structuring your responses using the STAR method (Situation, Task, Action, Result). If you were told you seemed nervous, practice power poses or breathing exercises before your next real interview.